Getting Crafty (Without the Crap)

Winter is always an interesting time for me, and I mean that in the same sense as the Agatean curse: "May you live in interesting times."  I have a tendency to get fed up with my surroundings (being cooped up in a closed house with little natural light) and so I clean...and clean...and clean...

This year was worse than the ones before, but also more productive, I think.  I reorganized the living room, and I've started to sort through my crafting materials and fabrics more thoroughly.  I'm reaching a point where I can start to breathe again, and taking a look around my home office doesn't immediately cause me to  cringe in horror.  It feels so good to be in a productive space.  So good, in fact, that now I'm feeling productive.

And I have nothing to produce.

Yes, I have some freelance coming up, and a small project I'm working on that will be done by the end of the weekend, but I haven't worked on anything for myself since...since...I don't know.  Since I last updated my Twitter background, I suppose, but that was back in...October?  And before that, I don't know how long it was (the winter miasma usually sets in as soon as it starts to get dark at 4 PM).

I've recently gone through all of my [crafting, sewing, knitting, painting, sculpting, gardening, crocheting, etc.] supplies, and I'm realizing just how long it's really been since I've been motivated to make something just for me.  I have all of these half-started projects that are lying in wait, but I can't finish them.  I don't like the fabric any more, or I don't have a need for the finished item, or it's too cold out to paint/there's no ventilation inside that's close to adequate.  Most of them just require more energy and time than I can dedicate right now (all of those quilts will just have to wait).  I thought of avoiding physical, tangible art, and readily discovered that I will sit at my computer with the art program of my choosing open in front of me, and all I do is stare at a blank canvas.

I've been trolling the craft blogs, trying to find something that inspires me, but everything that does requires more room, or all new supplies, or just isn't practical enough to really finish.  I find wallets, decorations, window treatments, and dice bags that I fall in love with, but I can't justify making...after all, I just spent 3 months identifying and getting rid of junk I don't want, don't need, or would find a better home elsewhere.  I've recycled, reused, donated and ditched...and I do not want to start over again.  Not this year.

So...what now?  I'm trying to think of things I need, something I can make and still find a use for.  I can't think of anything.  I guess the point of crafting, of sewing little things and knitting trinkets is just that: The quick things are fun, and silly, and not very useful...but they make us smile.  A sturdy bag is a welcome gift, but it won't get the same reaction as a hand-stitched robot doll.

If you look at the bag, you can smile at a job well done, but anyone who looks at the tiny robot can't help but smile.

Maybe...maybe I'm looking at this all wrong, from the perspective of a freelancer:  Something I make has to have worth, I have to work towards an end goal.  That kind of attitude can get you into trouble if you hold on to it for too long.  As an artist, doesn't everything I make inherently have some worth, somehow?  If I put time and skill and love into something, doesn't that render it useful, at least as a receptacle of that love? As proof or maintenance of that skill? As something that occupied time that would have otherwise been spent doing nothing?

The answer is yes—it's always yes—but knowing the answer doesn't open up entire avenues of inspiration.

-Roxxy

Freelance Planning in 2013

I've been meaning to check in, really I have.  Now that I've tied up the final loose ends from last year's contracts, it's time to start looking ahead and see how I can better prepare myself for 2013.

Here's what I've come up with:

• I took on too much, too soon, with too little time.  Since discovering this, I've switched to using a planner not unlike the one I packed around when I was in school.  I'm utilizing the calendar spreads to physically write in my own personal due dates, instead of storing them solely in Google Calendar where I'm able to shuffle or forget them without consequence.
• I didn't take enough time out to breathe, and that upset me more than I imagined.  This year, I am making sure I can budget in some down-time between projects.  I am also dedicating one day a week to doing nothing: no chores, no laundry, no freelance, no interruptions; I'll just hang out with the dog, or my husband, or play video games until bedtime and not feel guilty about it.
• I'm only allowed one project per month, because that allows me to take advantage of being single-minded.  If two projects overlap, I have to decline one of them.  Unpaid projects come in second to paid work, and there is no such thing as a Quick Little Piece that I can get done in a week or two.
• Documentation will not be my downfall.  Sure I know how much I spent on internet access, but do I know how much I put into fixing my computer?  How about how much I spent on hosting, or business cards?  Or reprints for lost business cards?  This year I've cleared out an entire drawer in our filing cabinet that will be dedicated solely to freelance and home office records, especially since this might be the year we upgrade our computers and other equipment.
• I will get out there.  I will keep business cards on me at all times, and I will try to meet clients face-to-face to discuss future projects.  We'll update the website with content and design, and I'll update the blog more frequently with design ideas, illustrations, and maybe even a few essays.

Hello, 2013.  I think you're going to be a good year.

- RG

Porn, Propriety, and You

Let's talk about sex, shall we?  Let's talk about sex for fun.  Let's talk about women enjoying sex without guilt, and couples not being embarrassed to be naked in front of each other.  Let's talk about how it's okay to look at portrayals of people having sex for fun, and how we don't have to feel guilty about it.

Or let's not, because grandma might overhear.  Or your niece.  Or someone I don't even know, who doesn't know me.  Oops.  Guess I'm a social pariah now, a liability to be associated with, a dirty-minded pervert.

And therein lies the problem.

Early this year I discovered I was on the "dream team" list for a comic anthology a friend was putting together, shoulder-to-shoulder with established comic book writers and artists, people who were known.  I might have turned it down, if I didn't know that this was an anthology of porno comics.  Spike wanted me for the revival of Smut Peddler: a collection of short comics written or illustrated by women, all about sex, available to everyone.  The emphasis of having female writers/artists was (and still is) to remind people that women can like sex and porn, that we participate in the activity of making it.  The pages aren't filled with women dominating men, subjecting them to their wiles, and degrading them; it's about people just, you know, having sex and having fun with it.  Some of it's beautiful, and some of it's funny, and some of it is sticky and makes you a little more hot and bothered than you'd expect.  And it's awesome.

So I joined up, because I loved the idea of standing up beside my fellow vagina-bearers and waving a little flag that says "I LOVE PORN TOO".  I wanted to add my voice to the growing mass that says "Sex is okay!".  My inner feminist made me proudly add my name to the list of authors who were contributing to the anthology...

...and my outer professional made sure it was a pen-name.

I still feel guilty about it, even as I contemplate the best panel arrangement to use for the blowjob scene.  I want to own my work, to tell people that this is a thing I believe in, but at the same time I can't afford to be prosecuted for it.  My office job that pays my bills and keeps me fed is a family-oriented game played by all ages.  My name shows up on more than one illustration, and while I could plug my ears and say "it's your own damn fault if you put my name into Google and click the links that show up", there's always the chance that one person has a child that could inadvertently find my name and what I've worked on...

...and what they'll find won't be a cute frog mascot.

Or my aunt will forget my email address, so she'll try and find me in some other way.  Or my sister-in-law might discover a side of me she hadn't expected because I draw vaginas.

I don't want the headache that goes with having to explain myself to my family, or to strangers...but at the same time, if I don't, then how will they know that maybe--just maybe--someone else besides them also thinks that porn is okay?

Smut Peddler submissions are due at the end of December, and the book should be available spring 2012.  I'll have copies available for sale, and if they're ordered from me or you track me down at a con, I will happily sign them.  Maybe next year I'll have burnt enough bridges or built up enough nerve to put my full name in the book, but until then you'll just have to guess which submission is mine.

- R

HoNoToGroABeMo.org - Beards for Boobies

(If you aren't familiar with the original set of incentives, click HERE.)


I'd like to personally thank everyone who's donated to Jeff Greiner 's How Not To Grow A Beard Month efforts - you guys are amazing! In order to help the guys reach their $5k goal, I'm seeing your bet and I'M GOING ALL IN!


I signed on to illustrate a character bust for one random contributor for every $100 donated direct to Jeff, up to 5 portraits to $500. This was announced around 6 pm tonight, and now he's in the lead...at $500.

You heard it here first: THE EFFECT STACKS! Get Jeff to $600, and I'll illustrate six different character busts, $700 and we chose 7 and so-forth.

Donate to save a boob, and you're in the drawing to win a bust. ;)

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It Came From The Stars!

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